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Your First Married Christmas

Get ready for custom made everything that says ‘Our First Christmas’ because everyone thinks they’re so cute and so clever and so original.

Meanwhile, most people don’t get married within a year… I said most so don’t get crazy. Anyway, more than likely it isn’t your first Christmas together but that doesn’t matter because you’re going to get a dozen ornaments that say that anyway. I get it Susan, you like custom ornaments. I’ll just go put this next to the 13 other ornaments I have that say my dogs name on it…. that’s another thing you get dozens of for some reason. Like, yes my dog is my life and I treat him like a child but I don’t need 15 custom ornaments that say Gizmo.

I had to get a second tree just so I could hang all of the ornaments that say ‘Just Engaged’, “Just Married”, “Our First Christmas’, and ‘Gizmo. It’s out of control.

Anyway, another thing that happens if you were married relatively close to the holiday, you skip gifts. I don’t know about anyone else but when we got married we each got something we really wanted with some of the money and the rest went into savings. Now we’re just about at Christmas and our parents are harassing us about what we want for gifts when we all know its going to be some custom crap about it being our first Christmas anyway, and we don’t want to blow the entire savings so we buy the bare minimum for everyone, excluding each other, and call it a day. And you and your spouse will agree to not get each other anything so you can save some money but deep down you know you’ll get crucified if you don’t get the other person a gift so you cave and get something but it comes in the mail when you’re not home so your spouse knows you got them something and knows exactly what it is because they’re nosey AF and read the label and then google it.

It’s so fun being married.

And if you’re really lucky, your mom will let you have Christmas Eve because you have a house now and you’re married and you should inherit the holiday. So you get to clean the entire house alone, cook for 35 people, and clean it all up after they all leave.

(eye roll, grunt)


Much love and good luck ladies and gents,




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Much love and good luck ladies and gentlemen,


Adulting · Homeowner · Houses · New Home

Homeowner Life 

Buy a house they said…

For the most part, it’s fun. No one yells at us to keep it down, we can have people over whenever we want, and no ones ever parked in my spot when I get home because I own that damn driveway! I can also take a shower whenever I want without the fear of the water scolding or freezing my entire body because someone else turned their shower on. That’s a huge plus.

What’s not fun is when an old pipe explodes under your brand new wood floor, the water gets shut off, the heat doesn’t work, and no one comes for 3 days. That’s not fun at all.

It also sucks when you have to pay the oil bill. And the electric bill. The water bill isn’t as offensive but it still sucks. I follow my fiancé around the house shutting lights off because we’re no Beyonce and Jay-Z. And if you come to my house and you’re cold, grab a blanket. I have plenty.

I’m just joking… but seriously the heats off unless there’s a chance the pipes will burst.

Anyway, being a homeowner is a huge accomplishment. If we’ve ever done anything right in life, it was setting up our future to be able to have a home we can call our own.

IKEA is our favorite place along with Lowes and Home Depot, which I never thought could be possible but it becomes so much fun to decorate and customize your space to exactly what you want.

Be careful when you throw out your boxes from any of those places because the garbage man will leave them in the road but he will take you garbage can… oh wait that was only us? Ok cool.

Oh and once you get a house and have a backyard, your little house-trained dog will no longer go on a pad and will demand you let him out every 5 minutes so he can bark at the neighbors dog until the neighbors dog pees on his head.

Real life.

Much love and good luck ladies and gents,